Thursday, 17 September 2015

Mike's memories "After shave"

Syb writing last week about Scrumpy reminded me of one or two more drinking incidents when I was in Cyprus. Before I started writing to Syb I was a bit wild; well there wasn’t much to do as we were virtually confined to camp for the whole of the time we were there, so drinking became an important pastime. Phil was a drinking companion of mine at the time and on one occasion we ran out of both money and booze. In our search to find something to drink we came upon a bottle of orange squash and a bottle of after shave (alcohol) so we thought we’d give it a try. I’ve long forgotten the proportions we mixed but I still remember the taste.  Actually the taste wasn’t too bad but the smell was atrocious, orange squash and Old Spice, our breath must have smelt beautiful.
Phil was a bit of an odd ball when he was on a survival exercise where each member of the team had to create an individual shelter for the night he took a bottle of Scotch downed it in one and slept peacefully in a ditch while his compatriots were scrubbing round trying to make shelters. I never did find out how he felt the next morning or what his Oi/c said.
There are many more tales of drunkenness but not particularly amusing so instead I’ll leave you with a little poem I remember from that time, I’m not sure where I found it, it could have been in Esquire or some magazine like that.

Starkle. Starkle little twink
Who the hell you am I think
I’m not under the affluence of incerhol
I’m not as drunk as some tinkle peep I am
I’ve only had tee martoonies
And I’ve all day to Sunday up in
I’m so drunk I don’t know who’s me yet
But the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

The spell checker has just had a fit!!


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